Confessions of a Torn Heart (Shared AU fic with Mikey)

It had been a week since the confrontation with...with Alex, Alice found herself in the same spot where it had all happened. She rubbed her temples, the headaches had remained ever since Alex had left. All because she was so worried and heartsick over Alex....he had deserved better. Tears of frusteration fell as she looked down at her lap, neither of her parents knew what had happened exactly. She had a feeling though that her dad would want to know what had happened....had she done thr right thing? Pushing him away the way she had....

"Is your head still hurting?" a gruff voice asked behind her. Micheal ahd obviously noticed something was wrong, and Odette was sure to suspect something. And they ahdb't seen ro heard from alex form over a week. Sure he didn't spend much time at home, but he always let them know where eh was, and he was never gone so long wihtot tellign them a word.
"Out with it. You're obviiouslt stressed or wokre dup over something. Did you have a fight with your brother?"

She bit her lip and turned to face him with tears in her eyes, "He's gone daddy....all because I was stupid and couldn't tell him in a gentle way. He...he kissed me dad, he told me that he wanted me and he wanted to know if I would choose him over anyone. I said no....and he snapped, dad did I do the right thing? By pushing him away? I mean what if he gets hurt even worse because I...I couldn't give him what he wanted." She said softly

Well... shit. Things had tunred out just like Michael had feared.
He sighend and satd won beside his daughter. "Yes you did the right thing," he said firmly. "You're siblings, it's wrong to have any feelings like that for the other."
No wonder Alex ahd suddnely dissaeprd like that. not even tellign his mother... who he always made sure not to worry.
Micheal fronwed angrily. "I should've concerntrated on him more" he growled. "That idiot..."

She shook her head, "Don't dad....I have as much to be blamed for as Alex does, I should have been more firm and I wasn't. I'm just so confused, I love Alex dad....I really do....and there are times where I scare myself because I...I start thinking things I shouldn't. What's wrong with me?" She asked, feeling disgusted with herself.

He closed his eyes. These two... had so much more in common with him and Joseph than all of them understood.
"You're just to used to havning him around. I know 'cause I've felt the same way..."
And I still do, he thought. He still felt like he'd soon go crazy if he didn't go and find Joseph.
"It's good that he's gone now, you need time away from him. You'r ejust confused right now. It'll pass, and more quicker if you start seeing other people."
He knew it wans't that easy, but the feleings they had was nothing but wrong and disgusting. Though he really didn't think that himself, he knew it was wrong.

She bit her lip, "Does the urge to run back ever leave?" She asked softly, she wanted nothing more then to run back to run back to Alex and apologize. She felt so scared of her own feelings....it was like they were spinning out of her control.

"If you run back to him now, no it won't."
He gave hr a hrd look, wanting her to let go and not give in. He neve really ahd anyone else while growing up, but she has. If she agve in to her feelings, thne she's be stuck, just like he is. And Alex... he might just grow more possesive of her until he lost his mind as well.

(ahh....I hate decisions...<<>>)
Alice just nodded, "I know.....he was willing to leave for me dad. He didn't want me stressing over him but dad ever since he left, the problem has just gotten worse. Its like I...I can't even do anything without him popping into my head." She said.

((ahahaha I feel your pain<3 it was the smae wiht Mickey :'3))

"Then try harder," he demanded. "Get out and find ways to distratc yourself with. Make firneds, live your life. You can't be so dman dependant on him. That'll be the end for you and him if you don't let go."

She winced and nodded before she coughed, blood splotches on her hand. "Will I ever completely get over it? I mean can I give my heart to someone entirely....who isn't Alex? Or will I be stuck living half a life?" She asked.

"Alice!"
He grabbed her blood stained hand and made her look him the eyes. "You and Alex are not like me and my brother. We may have our similarities but that's it. Nothing else. Just beacuse we fucked things up doens't mean you and Alex will do the same mistake, got it? You two are different people, with your own choises. Just be smart and make the right one."
His gripp on her hand turned more softer, comforting. "Life is not easy, nothing is. And hard decisions is a big oart of it. Don't throw our life away beaucse of yuóur feelings, who'll pass with time."

She glanced down at his hand, "You didn't answer my question dad, do you?" She asked as she glanced back up at him. The answer was important to her....did her dad even love her mom? Or not?

He narrowed his eyes. 'Love' was nothing more than a word to him. But she wanted an answear, she needed one. "I do," he said flatly. "But I still feel strongly for my brother. So no, my feelings won't completley dissaper, not now after being with him my whole life. However, that doens't mean you'll end up the same. You're your own person Alice. And you've had a completley different life than me."

She relaxed when he said that and then nodded, "Ok dad....I'll try, I'll meet other people and try and....move on." She said quietly. "Dad, when we were younger....did Alex remind you of Joseph?" She sked
(Mikey lied DX)

((about loving Odette or somethig else? xD))

He stayed quiet for a moment and shifted his gazeaway from her face. "Yes, in fatc he did," he said bluntly. "And he still does now, only more. Hasn't he already complained about that to you?"

(uhh yes XD)
Alice looked down and nodded, "He said it bothered him that you used to watch over me more them him. Then he started wanting what he couldn't have.....and that's when all this started up." She said quietly.

((he wasn't lying o3o))

"I'm not exactly 'fahter materiel'. Jim is proof enough don't ya think," he said coldly. "Though of course, that's no excuse. Guess I worried to much, and failed too see how to really handle the situation. The last thing I wnated for you to end up like us."

(o-o HE DOES??!! *faints*)
Alice leaned over and held his hand, "Its ok dad, we'll be fine...and thank you for talking with me dad, it really helped me." She said quietly.

((well yeah I thought you knew already? xD *fans you*))

"It would only help if you actually followed my advice," he sateted and got up. "...try avoiding Alex. Don't go look him up."

(n...n..not that he loves her...*faints again* <3333)
Alice nodded, "Ok dad....what should we tell mom about Alex?" She asked quietly. She was doing her best not to think about Alex....not now.

((oh wifey ^^ *fans you more* gah I wnat alice to find him, or run into him or something gaaaah x'D))

He frowned. Odette would be killing ehrself with worry if alex didn't contact them soon. "That depends. How worried is she?"

(hmm she could run into him? :3)
Alice bit her lip, "Not great...she hasn't said anything to me...but I know she hasn't slept for the past three nights. She's working extra hard and...in some ways she's worse then me." She admitted.

((whatever you see fit best<3 ^^ he'll probably jsut try to turn the toher way though x'3))

Of course, he thought, only getting more irritated at Alex. he wans't a selfish person. And even thoguh he did this for ALice sake he forgot about everyone else.
"Tell her I'll find him, that should calm her down a little."

((oh... what if she stumbles upon mikey finding him? 8D))

(ohh that would be intense.... YES!! Lets <333)
Alice bit her lip, she knew her dad could find anyone as he knew who to talk too. "Ok, I'll tell her." She said quietly.